68 days and counting
It's been 68 days and counting since I first threw out the books and decided to have myself an awesome holiday. "One like no other!" I'd promised myself. "The holiday to cap all holidays!" which made perfect sense at the time. After all, what else would I do with close to four months of unscheduled, unplanned time on my hands? But the bigger reason behind my enthusiasm, behind my solemn pledge to have absolutely nothing but fun was really quite simple.
It was, you see, simply the very last holiday I would be spending with someone who has become pretty close to me over the past two years or so. Now, I know it's quite impossible to make close friends, what more best friends in any fixed period of time, and I'm a staunch believer in that. I think it takes so much more than hanging out with a person and liking the same movies and going for the same concerts and stuff like that to make someone your best friend.
But the truth is, I've never been to any concerts, I'd probably go to the movies with my cousins maybe, and when Terri and I started going to different colleges, I almost stopped hanging out completely. I suppose I felt at that very moment the way a barnacle must have felt when it lost its piece of driftwood and that if felt that it would be imposing on the driftwood's new life if it had returned.
Besides, I felt that it was about time I started living my own life and stop forcing others to be involved in it! Also, from that day I stopped asking for things unless absolutey necessary. Even when I had to ask for cash to pay my semester fee, I'd have to work myself up to say it. No one may have noticed it, but from that moment I swore that I would no longer be a nuisance (though I daresay I failed in other aspects of keeping my nose in my own beeswax!)
I suppose it would only be fair to admit that when group occasions arose, such as someone's birthday party, I'd usually turn up along with everyone else. Still, there was a part of me that longed for the days when I could actually relate to someone and not merely be a part of a group of people who probably didn't even know what my favourite cartoon was!
Of course, officially Caryn and I would've known each other for slightly more than two years now, yet the truth is we've only been friends for about slightly more than half of that but in that short time, I'm pleased to say that I could never have asked for anything more!
In fact, she's the only person I know whom, besides Terri, can call me an "Frickin' Himbo" and would mean it in the nicest way possible.
To which I could retort "Well, your voice is so damned annoying honey! Especially over the phone!" also, meant in the nicest way possible.
No proof needed.
Now, I never actually called her my best friend...nor did she, me. We were above that sort of thing, you see. Or at least we believed it. Now, I might be dunking for apples in cider at a halloween gig here but what I think is that we had both probably gotten out of similar situations. I suppose the circumstances of our lives had been almost entirely remote and different from one another, but the fact remained that I don't think either of us have had that sense of truly belonging anywhere ever before. She said herself that she had always been the girl who drooled over boybands just so she could fit into a clique. And I...well, I was the guy who didn't even have a clique!
"Don't believe in best friends." I'd say.
"yeah," she'd retort. "me too!"
"Yup!
And so, I suppose it's understandable, our caution, at so casually flinging the term "best friend"...or even "friend" for that matter around. In fact, if memory serves me the closest thing we've ever gotten to admit it was when I was mad at a certain someone for spamming the cbox in my old blog and he had approached her with the question "hey, is Cyren pissed at me or something?"
"How would i know?" She'd said
to which he had replied
"Well, aren't you his best friend or something?!"
to which she simply said
"Yeah, I suppose so."
That's that for you. Nothing more. Not even a clarrification as to which question she was answering. But when she told me about it much later I knew. She didn't have to tell which it was.
Didn't need to. You just learn to pick these things up after awhile.
Judging from this, I suppose you can guess that there were times when we kept things from each other, which in my opinion was fine.
They say that best friends are supposed to have no secrets from each other. Well, I beg to differ. I think everyone, including family and best friends alike should have their healthy share of secrets.
Of course, there are some things that you can share here and there,but I sincerely do not believe that it is possible to completely share everything with any single person at any single time.
Even after marriage, there will be something you neglect to tell your partner from your past. Even if it is a small pointless little detail like the first time you had kissed a girl. So screw what they say and, if you will not take this as arrogance on my part, listen to what I say;
I say, that it is okay for best friends to keep secrets from each other. And the true beauty of friendship is in one friend's ability, no self control (because it's really difficult sometimes) , in respecting the other's need for privacy. A man's secret is, after all his past. And a man's past, is after all, his own business. Think about it.
Anyways, now she's in Australia, not exactly where I'd be in a couple of months time but most definitely the same country. And It's been 68 days and counting since we first threw out the books and decided to have ourselves an awesome holiday.
"A roadtrip!" I had said.
"And like, who is gonna drive us ?!" she retorted.
"I want to go to the beach!"
"No I want to go camping!"
"Let's call just a few people, my boyfriend, maybe Elaine, Rachel...her boyfriend maybe?"
"Can I bring some really good MPAC friends too!"
"Sure. How about we go somewhere where we can camp on the beach?"
"Great idea!"
"Pangkor!"
"No...Langkawi!"
"You know, I'd settle with Penang."
And on it went of course, leading up to...absolutely nothing. Or...almost nothing I suppose. Caryn, got to spend the better part of the last 68 days in the Swiss Alps with her family and I, after a rather brief family vacation to Singapore, ended up working in my dead end job with a rather pleasant woman named Veronica.
In the meantime though Caryn's abscence meant that I had began socializing with my three pals from MPAC more and more and eventually, too, they seemed awesome!
"They're so cool!" I told Caryn just before she left. "And I wouldn't have asked for a more awesome group of people to hang out with now that I'm not gonna see you for the next two years or so!!!!"
"Don't be stupid." was all she had said. With no reference to whether it was the former or the latter she was referring to.
But she didn't need to. I already knew. You just learn to pick these things up after awhile.
"We're so psychic!" our favourite catchphrase.
It's funny, how life can sometimes take you away from the things you had planned and yet keep you so near as well. 68 days ago, and counting, I had swore to have the awesomeest vacation in the world! And though it didn't exactly turn out the way I had wished for it to be, I can't say that I'm unhappy with the results.
So while the scoreboard might still read that I had spent the better part of 68 days,and counting, behind a wooden desk doing absolutely nothing for five bucks and hour, I will still leave the triumphant player with three totally awesome new friends. (That's you guys, Bags, Bernie and Vic)
And although we've gone a long way from one and a half years back, I don't think she's going to personally tell me what a best friend I've been. Not that I'd do anything like that either. In fact, I didn't even go to see her off at the airport.
But then again, I never felt the need to. You see, there's just some things you learn to naturally pick up after awhile.
"And who do you expect to stand by my side when I fight for animal rights now that you're gone?"
There's loads of people...
...right.
PEACE OUT
It's been 68 days and counting since I first threw out the books and decided to have myself an awesome holiday. "One like no other!" I'd promised myself. "The holiday to cap all holidays!" which made perfect sense at the time. After all, what else would I do with close to four months of unscheduled, unplanned time on my hands? But the bigger reason behind my enthusiasm, behind my solemn pledge to have absolutely nothing but fun was really quite simple.
It was, you see, simply the very last holiday I would be spending with someone who has become pretty close to me over the past two years or so. Now, I know it's quite impossible to make close friends, what more best friends in any fixed period of time, and I'm a staunch believer in that. I think it takes so much more than hanging out with a person and liking the same movies and going for the same concerts and stuff like that to make someone your best friend.
But the truth is, I've never been to any concerts, I'd probably go to the movies with my cousins maybe, and when Terri and I started going to different colleges, I almost stopped hanging out completely. I suppose I felt at that very moment the way a barnacle must have felt when it lost its piece of driftwood and that if felt that it would be imposing on the driftwood's new life if it had returned.
Besides, I felt that it was about time I started living my own life and stop forcing others to be involved in it! Also, from that day I stopped asking for things unless absolutey necessary. Even when I had to ask for cash to pay my semester fee, I'd have to work myself up to say it. No one may have noticed it, but from that moment I swore that I would no longer be a nuisance (though I daresay I failed in other aspects of keeping my nose in my own beeswax!)
I suppose it would only be fair to admit that when group occasions arose, such as someone's birthday party, I'd usually turn up along with everyone else. Still, there was a part of me that longed for the days when I could actually relate to someone and not merely be a part of a group of people who probably didn't even know what my favourite cartoon was!
Of course, officially Caryn and I would've known each other for slightly more than two years now, yet the truth is we've only been friends for about slightly more than half of that but in that short time, I'm pleased to say that I could never have asked for anything more!
In fact, she's the only person I know whom, besides Terri, can call me an "Frickin' Himbo" and would mean it in the nicest way possible.
To which I could retort "Well, your voice is so damned annoying honey! Especially over the phone!" also, meant in the nicest way possible.
No proof needed.
Now, I never actually called her my best friend...nor did she, me. We were above that sort of thing, you see. Or at least we believed it. Now, I might be dunking for apples in cider at a halloween gig here but what I think is that we had both probably gotten out of similar situations. I suppose the circumstances of our lives had been almost entirely remote and different from one another, but the fact remained that I don't think either of us have had that sense of truly belonging anywhere ever before. She said herself that she had always been the girl who drooled over boybands just so she could fit into a clique. And I...well, I was the guy who didn't even have a clique!
"Don't believe in best friends." I'd say.
"yeah," she'd retort. "me too!"
"Yup!
And so, I suppose it's understandable, our caution, at so casually flinging the term "best friend"...or even "friend" for that matter around. In fact, if memory serves me the closest thing we've ever gotten to admit it was when I was mad at a certain someone for spamming the cbox in my old blog and he had approached her with the question "hey, is Cyren pissed at me or something?"
"How would i know?" She'd said
to which he had replied
"Well, aren't you his best friend or something?!"
to which she simply said
"Yeah, I suppose so."
That's that for you. Nothing more. Not even a clarrification as to which question she was answering. But when she told me about it much later I knew. She didn't have to tell which it was.
Didn't need to. You just learn to pick these things up after awhile.
Judging from this, I suppose you can guess that there were times when we kept things from each other, which in my opinion was fine.
They say that best friends are supposed to have no secrets from each other. Well, I beg to differ. I think everyone, including family and best friends alike should have their healthy share of secrets.
Of course, there are some things that you can share here and there,but I sincerely do not believe that it is possible to completely share everything with any single person at any single time.
Even after marriage, there will be something you neglect to tell your partner from your past. Even if it is a small pointless little detail like the first time you had kissed a girl. So screw what they say and, if you will not take this as arrogance on my part, listen to what I say;
I say, that it is okay for best friends to keep secrets from each other. And the true beauty of friendship is in one friend's ability, no self control (because it's really difficult sometimes) , in respecting the other's need for privacy. A man's secret is, after all his past. And a man's past, is after all, his own business. Think about it.
Anyways, now she's in Australia, not exactly where I'd be in a couple of months time but most definitely the same country. And It's been 68 days and counting since we first threw out the books and decided to have ourselves an awesome holiday.
"A roadtrip!" I had said.
"And like, who is gonna drive us ?!" she retorted.
"I want to go to the beach!"
"No I want to go camping!"
"Let's call just a few people, my boyfriend, maybe Elaine, Rachel...her boyfriend maybe?"
"Can I bring some really good MPAC friends too!"
"Sure. How about we go somewhere where we can camp on the beach?"
"Great idea!"
"Pangkor!"
"No...Langkawi!"
"You know, I'd settle with Penang."
And on it went of course, leading up to...absolutely nothing. Or...almost nothing I suppose. Caryn, got to spend the better part of the last 68 days in the Swiss Alps with her family and I, after a rather brief family vacation to Singapore, ended up working in my dead end job with a rather pleasant woman named Veronica.
In the meantime though Caryn's abscence meant that I had began socializing with my three pals from MPAC more and more and eventually, too, they seemed awesome!
"They're so cool!" I told Caryn just before she left. "And I wouldn't have asked for a more awesome group of people to hang out with now that I'm not gonna see you for the next two years or so!!!!"
"Don't be stupid." was all she had said. With no reference to whether it was the former or the latter she was referring to.
But she didn't need to. I already knew. You just learn to pick these things up after awhile.
"We're so psychic!" our favourite catchphrase.
It's funny, how life can sometimes take you away from the things you had planned and yet keep you so near as well. 68 days ago, and counting, I had swore to have the awesomeest vacation in the world! And though it didn't exactly turn out the way I had wished for it to be, I can't say that I'm unhappy with the results.
So while the scoreboard might still read that I had spent the better part of 68 days,and counting, behind a wooden desk doing absolutely nothing for five bucks and hour, I will still leave the triumphant player with three totally awesome new friends. (That's you guys, Bags, Bernie and Vic)
And although we've gone a long way from one and a half years back, I don't think she's going to personally tell me what a best friend I've been. Not that I'd do anything like that either. In fact, I didn't even go to see her off at the airport.
But then again, I never felt the need to. You see, there's just some things you learn to naturally pick up after awhile.
"And who do you expect to stand by my side when I fight for animal rights now that you're gone?"There's loads of people...
...right.
PEACE OUT
